The 5 secrets to controlling your anger


Is anger a sin?  As Christians, are we supposed to try not to be angry? What do we do with anger issues?

Anger is a very real human emotion we all experience. God put within us the ability to feel all kinds of emotions, negative and positive ones.

Anger serves a very real purpose in our lives

We must experience anger:

  • at social injustices
  • at our lives being endangered
  • at unfair treatment of a co-worker
  • or to protect a child

Anger is a very dangerous emotion too. It can be a ticking bomb to our soul.

How do we deal with that anger that can eat away at the inside of us?

The emotional intelligence expert, Daniel Goleman tells us there is a point at which anger becomes rage.

At this stage anger turns into sin. We can sin against God, against another human being or even against ourselves.

In your anger do not sin: Do not let the sun go down while you are still angry. – Ephesians 4:26

That’s why Ephesians tells us to:

Get rid of all bitterness, rage and anger, brawling and slander, along with every form of malice. Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you. – Ephesians 4:31-32


While the anger is still hot, we have to get rid of it, before it turns to rage, to bitterness, and to malice.

The experts tell us anger is the one emotion people are worst at controlling. It is also a seductive, negative emotion. We feel righteous about being angry.

In fact, we are energized by our anger, carried along by the strength of its chemical release in our blood stream, and we convince ourselves it should not be controlled. After all, we have a right to feel this way!

Anger, leading to rage is the main cause of crimes of passion, where abuse happens or a person may even kill his beloved.

There is a moment when anger rises, where you have the presence of mind to control it, and to ‘let off steam’, to choose not to let the anger become rage. In that tiny turning space, when you exercise self-control, your anger will subside and you will be able to think clearly and act responsibly.

This is why YOU MUST GET RID OF ANGER, before you sin in your anger.

5 secrets to controlling your anger

When you feel anger rising, remember this acronym – take STOCK:

  1. Stop right there.
  2. Think- yes, use your ability to reason it out.
  3. Opt out of the situation or get away from the person.
  4. Count to 10 and TAKE DEEP BREATHS.
  5. Keep moving- if you still feel anger rising, GO FOR A BRISK WALK till you calm down.

After that moment of decision has passed and you have chosen not to take STOCK, the chemicals that flood the brain are powerful. This is called emotional hijacking. There may even be loss of memory of the incident as rage carries you along to harmful action either to self or to others.

But, once you have taken STOCK and you are in control of yourself, you can ask God the Holy Spirit for clarity and wisdom to deal with the person or the situation.

Alison Ward

Alison is married to Steve; they have two married daughters, and five grandchildren, and live in Gauteng, South Africa. She has pastored with her husband for thirty-three years, has a nursing background, and recently completed a master’s degree in leadership and coaching. Alison is passionate about teaching the Bible and partnering with women to fulfill their gifts and potential.


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